May 26, 2025Author: Grant Moher, Esq.
May 26, 2025Author: Grant Moher, Esq.
Divorce is complex, emotional, and often misunderstood. In Episode 3 of the Attorneys Dedicated to Family Law podcast, Grant T. Moher, attorney and founding partner of Curran Moher Weis, takes a closer look at some of the most common myths surrounding divorce in Virginia. The episode offers valuable insights on custody, spousal support, premarital agreements, and legal separation—all with the goal of helping individuals make informed decisions during a difficult time.
One of the most pervasive misconceptions is that Virginia courts favor mothers or fathers in custody decisions. In reality, Virginia law does not presume any particular custody arrangement and does not automatically favor one parent based on gender. Instead, courts focus on what serves the best interests of the child, guided by a specific set of statutory factors. These include each parent’s role in the child’s life, ability to co-parent, and any history of abuse. Judges have broad discretion, which can make outcomes unpredictable—one reason families are often encouraged to resolve custody outside of court whenever possible.
Unlike child support, which follows a standardized formula, spousal support in Virginia is highly case-specific. There are temporary guidelines for spousal support during the divorce process (known as pendente lite support), but there are no formulas for post-divorce support. Courts consider various factors, such as the length of the marriage, differences in income, lifestyle during the marriage, and each party’s financial needs and abilities. These subjective considerations make outcomes harder to predict and highlight the need for experienced legal guidance.
Premarital agreements, often referred to as “prenups,” are another area where misunderstandings abound. They are not generic, boilerplate documents. A well-drafted agreement should be tailored to the couple’s unique goals, such as protecting a family business or ensuring inheritance rights for children from a previous relationship. Poorly written or outdated agreements can cause serious issues later on—particularly if they fail to anticipate life changes or are unclear in their terms. While these agreements can be revised by mutual consent, they are otherwise difficult to alter once signed.
Many people believe they must wait an entire year after separating to even begin the divorce process. This is false. While Virginia law generally requires a one-year separation to finalize a divorce, parties can file much earlier. Additionally, if a couple has no minor children and has signed a separation agreement, they may be eligible for divorce after just six months. Understanding the distinction between filing and finalizing is crucial for setting realistic expectations about the divorce timeline.
In some cases, spouses remain in the same home due to financial or logistical reasons. It is possible to be “legally separated” while living under one roof—if both parties truly live separate lives. That means sleeping in different rooms, not sharing meals, doing separate chores, avoiding joint outings, and generally acting as roommates rather than spouses. Courts will examine these details closely when determining whether a valid separation has occurred.
Divorce is not a one-size-fits-all process. Just because a friend or family member had a certain outcome doesn’t mean yours will be the same. Laws vary by state, and even within Virginia, individual judges may interpret factors differently. Personalized legal guidance from an experienced family law attorney is essential to navigating the system effectively and avoiding costly mistakes.
To explore more family law topics and get clear, practical advice from attorneys who understand Virginia law, listen to the Attorneys Dedicated to Family Law podcast wherever you get your podcasts. For legal resources or to schedule a consultation, visit Curran Moher Weis.
